Rare Occurrence – Both Sides

Posted: June 19, 2008 by THE Drama Mama in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

big-mama 06-18-2008 07:38 PM

Really frustrated – wwyd? – added pics
So, i bought 5 dipes from a WAHM on here. She also has a hyenacart and has good feeback so i wasnt worried. I paid right away (may 24?) I hadnt heard anything for awhile but on june 5th she said she would be shipping them priority the next day. And that she would send me the DC# and i should get it on Monday or Tuesday. I didnt get a pm. She was on ds. I pm’d her a few times and she was reading them but not responding. Finally on the 12th(the thursday after she said i would get them on mon or tues) she responded to a pm with the dc # saying they were delivered.
I get them and they look okay so i put them in the wash. All 4 look like seconds. They have random pieces of fabric stitched together. 2 of the inners have the fabric cut and stitched together. One of which is coming apart after one wash. This one also is coming out of the FOE. The 3rd dipe is coming out of the FOE also AND it is pieced together on the outer right at the front where the snaps are! And she put that fabric going a diff direction.
There are other issues but these are the worst ones.
When i asked her about this she offers for me to send them back and have her fix them. I tell her i would like a refund or new dipe on the 2 that are really messed up. She says no refunds and no returns and DENIES that the inners are patched together. She also says she ran out of fabric so she just pieced the outers together instead of pming to ask if that was okay.
She sends me a rude email about how she never has problems etc.

With how bad her comm has been and how much she doesnt care about the quality i am afraid to have her “fix” them.
I was thinking of selling them on FSOT with a huge description of the flaws in hopes that someone who makes dipes can fix them up or use them some how.

I can post pics of the flaws if that will help you see – since the descriptions of the issues are hard to word.


And from the WAHM in question… in the WAHM thread, sorry it’s funky, this was emailed to me by someone other than the WAHM:

> Do you think I'm wrong here?
> Posted by:
> On: 06-18-2008 10:40 PM
> Okay, I did a custom order of some pockets for a mama and she keeps
> back to me with this or that and giving me grief!
> Here's the scoop:  Of the prints she ordered 2 of the outer cotton
> were not quite wide enough so I pieced a litle bit of the tab so that
> wouldn't be too small in the waist.  I've done it before and no one
> seemed to mind and I make it not noticeable if at all and make sure
 it is
> very securely sewn to never come apart.  It had nothing to do with
 the PUL
> or the lining so I know it doesn't affect performance.  She didn't
> me about this issue until after she started complaining about other
> After she got them, washed them and used them she said they might be
> little wide in the crotch though they were standard to me as far as I
> tell from all the ones I have seen/used but I know all kids are
> and brands differ too so maybe she was just used to something
> She didn't mind and used a wider insert and said it was fine.  I even

> offered to send her a free insert for the heck of it, she didn't want
> Then a week later she e-mailed saying the outer fabric was coming
> from under the FOE trim and I offered to pay shipping to have it sent
> to fix it, she refused.  Then 2 days later she said another one was
> it, I offered to fix, she said no.  I reoffered one more time to pay
> fixing with no response.  Now today (almost 3 weeks after her reciept
> them) she does want to send them back for fixing, that's fine, I
> mind.  It's a 2 minute fix and not something that should have
 happened.  I
> even offered to do all 4 in order to make sure the other 2 wouldn't
> that since obviously it's easier to doit all at once.  She responded
> saying no justthe 2 since her LO was already at mid snap setting and
> want him to outgrow them while waiting for them to be fixed (like
> gonna take a year or something?).  So, I asked her for her e-mail to
> her PP with to print a label with for mailing back, she sent it to me
> immediately after that e-mail I get one that starts pointing out 6
> she doesn't like about them and then wants a refund for them after
> them for 2 weeks!?  Wouldn't common sense dictate that if you don't
> the little piece job I did on the tab that you should speak up right
> Or anything else to speak up?  I would also think that anyone would
> that when trying multiples of a "new-to-you" brand to try one first
> leave the rest as new so they are returnable.  I polietly but firmly
> responded that I don't mind fixing where the spot of FOE/fabric is
> but that I can't/don't do refunds or replacements on used diapers.
  Was I
> wrong to do that?  I don't want to tick her off but I don't want to
> taken advantage of eitheir.  I'm just so frustrated!  It also stated
> the thread she bought one item from the following so I think it's
> clear:
> If you have any questions please ask prior to purchase. Due to the
> of the items we can not accept returns on used items, if you order
> wrong size we will be happy to exchange it for the correct size.
> will be responsible for shipping both ways for the exchange.
> We warranty the items against defects on our work (Stitching and
> construction) and also on Snaps for 30 days from date of receipt. If
> shows abnormal wear and tear or abuse warranty will be voided. Simply

> return the item to us and we will fix or replace the item at our
> discretion.
Part of me thinks it would just be easier to refund her and get it
> with :banghead:
> Re: Do you think I'm wrong here?
> Posted by:
> On: 06-19-2008 12:38 AM
> Yeah well, now she has this thread in Transactions that is mostly
 full of
> lies so now I can't even resell the pockets or everyone will know it
> me.  She has all them bashing me and they don't even know it.  I was
> difficult, never didn't communicate, never rude, tried and tried and
> to work something out.  She was
> dead set on THOSE prints and it took her 4 DAYS to make up her mind
 in the
> first place that I didn't want to ask her to change her mind again!
> fault, I know, I didn't see them as bad but I guess maybe so.  I'm so

> upset I just want to quit all together.  I know she is going topitch
 a fit
> and probably still leave negative FB like everyone is telling her to
 do so
> they know who it is when she finds out she isn't getting a refund on
> shipping!  I have half a mind to take the strike and tell my side of
> story!  She is making me out to be some sort of MONSTER and I am not!
> is totally not telling all the facts!

So, what do you think? Just who is telling the truth?

  1. Elise says:

    Whole story isn’t posted. The rest of the post is as follows:

    I think I sewed those 2 patches on upside down, I cut them to where they were a seamless picture match (what I get for hurrying I know!)

    I guess I know now, I’ve learned a lot the hard way over the years and honestly had no idea what a “second” even was. I’ve gotten worse things in the mail that I’ve bought from mamas, now I know to complain about them and what I should expect.

    I’m trying to move on but it’s not easy being bashed like that even though they don’t know who it is, I do and it hurts. Especially when you can’t give your side of the story (I did try and try and try to work something out before just giving in to doing a refund to make her go away which now my husband is pissed at me about doing~I’m getting it from all sides!) I even offered the partial refund and still fix the little holes where the fabric was coming unsewn but she wouldn’t even do that! It hurts more that people would be so quick to push for leaving bad FB just they can know who it is (partially I am sure to get past the no outing rule and still know who it is) I didn’t do it on purpose, she just had me so frazzled I screwed up. I’m trying to fix but she is still making it difficult. Now she wants me to refund her first then she’ll send them back, NO WAY! I think she is finally going to send them back first but who knows……

    And also:
    Honestly, and I am being honest, I really and truly had no clue that piecing a little fabric made it a second. Yes I’ve now learned my lesson. What I’ve presented is just the top of the iceberg. Her PM’s are crazy and from the time I responded to her ISO (my mistake for doing that!) to the time she paid was 6 days and somewhere around 50-60 PM’s all of which I answered. The ones she says I didn’t answer were over the weekend asking for the DC# (because she used RME they don’t have CNS so it didn’t send it to her automatically) and my LO was sick, I was doing Fundraisers, etc so I didn’t get back to her right away so there were like 3 or 4 PM’s over a less than 48 hour span all asking the same thing so I of course only responded to 1.

    I have tested them on my LO and didn’t have any issues and I’ve made many for other mamas in pull-up form also with no issues. It’s just a botched batch and I offered to fix them, she kept refusing. She never mentioned the disatisfaction with anything else until after the fact of wash/use. I guess being a seamstress and having been screwed over by one too many Fly by Night WAHM’s I always check something I buy right away and thouroughly before washing because I know that 99.9% of WAHM’s don’t accept returns on a used product. My biggest issue is that she had them for a week (I was thinking it was 2 weeks but I guess the PO was slow in delivering or something or maybe all this has been such a dramatic nightmare that time has become misconstrued in my mind) and then decides after using them that she all of the sudden doesn’t like them.

    I guess with all the crud I was dealing with in the last 2-3 weeks I just wasnting thinking straight and had I given it some thought (hard to do with pregnant brain 🙂 I would have e-mailed her and asked.

    I’m not bashing a customer here and I don’t normally do this I am just at my wits end and didn’t know really what I did was considered wrong. Now I do. I’ve been making diapers for 3 years, did that several times and never out of 1000’s of diapers made had one single complaint so I really and truly didn’t know it was considered a faux paux (sp?) and won’t do it again! As for keeping stock on hand, these were leftover seasonal fabrics I had last Halloween, can’t get them anymore and when she initially ordered she wanted Medium then at the last minute changed her mind and wanted large. I wouldn’t have had to piece the medium so when she ordered I never said anything cause the issue wasn’t there, I guess I just got confused thinking “Oh there’s enough for a large” and not checking and again my fault. Won’t do it again. In fact I’m only doing Semi-custom orders from now on after the baby is born and no more for now eitheir semi or full custom, not going there. I am going to restructure my fabrics and clean out what I don’t use and then MIGHT on occasion offer a full custom order but we’ll see.

    On the upside, my 2.5 yr old wears a large so I can just use them on him instead. Needed to make him some more diapers anyway

    I just got flustered and responded to quickly last night when she all of the sudden turned on a dime and didn’t want any of them wanted a full refund. I was blind sided because at first she didn’t want me to fix them, and then she did then all of the sudden didn’t want them at all. I don’t want her to get the wrong idea and think I am a bad seamstress with a bad business or that she can’t trust me or any other WAHM’s but I guess nothing I do at this point would make her happy so I should just let it go. Sometimes I take things too personally and go too far and end up doing more harm then good when trying to fix it. I don’t know. I’ve considered making her a new Pocket for free with no patching and a trimmer between the legs area but I don’t know if it’d do any good.

  2. siriusmama says:

    “So, what do you think? Just who is telling the truth?”
    Kind of both of them but mostly the customer. Now I’m not saying the WAHM was purposefully lying, she did change her OP to state that she was mistaken about the time frame as it really was less than a week. I feel bad that the WAHM is so upset about it because she really doesn’t seem to know that her diapers (for lack of a more polite phrase) suck ass. I advised her to refund shipping as well as sending money for them to be shipped back to her. I really hope she takes my advice and learns from this situation. I personally would not have let those diapers see the light of day.

  3. What a wanker says:

    That WAHM has a serious problem with customer service. I have dealt with lots of customers over the years (yes, I’m a WAHM and have been for several years), and I would never, ever talk about ANY customer the way she did, even in my head, let alone a public forum, even the biggest pain the rear customer. Who CARES if the customer took 4 days to pick out her fabrics? Who CARES if there were 50-60 (which I am sure was exagerated) PM”s before the final sale was decided upon. WHO CARES if she was a little difficult. I have had “feelings” that customer were going to be a pain, and you know what, they end up being my best customers because am honest, patient and caring with them.

    Honestly, I think this WAHM needs to take her own advise and quit until she gets her head screwed on straight and learns something about customer service.

    She admitted she peice mealed these diapers together without an OK from the customer HELLO!!!!! Yeah, she is big time in the wrong….

  4. haha says:

    In the customers defense sometimes diapers are great until they get washed. I bought some diapers that looked okay until I washed them and they literally fell apart.

    Piecing the fabric together without her permission?? OMFG that’s wrong on so many levels. I don’t care if it doesn’t effect performance. Among other things she couldn’t resell them for even close to what she paid for them because of it (especially the black one that’s falling apart)

    OMG get a grip!

  5. Nicki says:

    Sounds like the biggest clusterf*ck ever.
    I’m thinking that the WAHM just did a crap-ass job though…

  6. Nicki says:

    Woah, I just saw the pics…not cool.

  7. The Original Just Me says:

    I would definitely be upset as the customer for having paid full price on a seconds diaper. If there were sooo many pms between the two of them, the WAHM could have mentioned the piecing together of the fabric at some point BEFORE making the diaper. I know when ordering custom dipes I have taken a few days to think about what colors I want etc and the mamas have been extremely patient with me and never complained, which is what keeps me going back for more. Customer service is just as important to me as the quality of what I am purchasing!

  8. WAHM says:

    What the WAHM fails to mention in her posts is that I gave her a discount when she puchased them, that she only paid $8.75 per diaper in the first place and that the discount she had already received, the $1 discount I offered her, and fixing the ones that were coming unsewn brought them down to seconds prices. She didn’t tell anyone that she didn’t pay much for themin the first place. I’m sure everyone is thinking Icharged her as much as a BG or FB but I didn’t. For what shepaid it wasn’t worth the grief and no I am not exaggerating, there really were that many PM’s. 2 Full pages worth of her going back and forth between choosing AIO’s or Pockets or a mix or no Pockets or no AIO’s and making me firgure up the prices over and over. I was so confused and turned around by the time she ordered I’m amazed I actually got it.

    I never intended for any of this to be public, It was something that should have been privately solved and I was trying to solve it with her but she made it public and then the rest of the DS community made it into this witch hunt when they hadn’t a clue what was going on. If you haven’t actually seen the diapers or used them you can’t pass judgement and have no right to. She made it public and started bashing me not telling all of the facts and still hasn’t so I was forced to defend myself. She loved the diapers when she got them, she told me that they worked, she used them several times over the course of a 7 day period, I was already working with her to fix the two spots that had come loose from the FOE (which at first she denied letting me do on 2 occasions then she finally agreed) After we had worked that out and was ready to send them back she then decided to complain about the piecing of the fabric. After they had been used, I offered the partial refund she refused, If she didn’t like it she should have said something immediately upon receipt not after using them for a week. I really had no clue about it not being kosher. Now I do and won’t do it again. I am a real person with real feelings and all of this is quite unneccesary. Everyone makes mistakes but not everyone likes to admit that they do or remember that we are all human. No one is perfect. Even in business I am just human and do occasonally make mistakes (and I KNOW I am not the only WAHM who has made a mistake) but we have worked it out and I have agreed to the refund and she is returning them, it’s no ones business but hers and mine and I’m really tired of this nonsense.

  9. Grogwench says:

    WAHM, should it matter what she paid for them? If you didn’t say they were ‘seconds’, then she should have expected quality, and should have gotten that.

    I agree with “what a wanker”, I don’t know that I’d want to be a customer of yours with the attitude you’ve shown. You may think the customer is a pain, but you certainly don’t go around saying it. It makes other customers wonder what you’ve said/thought about them.

  10. Vanna says:

    Dude, WAHM you gotta stop lying if you ever want your business to prosper. I have had private conversation with the buyer and I wish I could post it here. I hope they come speak for themselves as there are so many falsehoods in your statements.
    Fess up to your mistakes, apologize, then spend your efforts making quality products.

  11. just me says:

    So who is the WAHM?

  12. just me –

    I don’t know the WAHM. The name was deleted out in the email and I don’t have WAHM forum access.

  13. PSA says:


  14. What a wanker says:

    The WAHM is:

    DS screen name: clothmamaof4
    Hyena Cart: http://www.Hyenacart.com/turtletails
    DS WAHM Thread: http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=458233

  15. What a wanker says:

    I take HUGE issue with the obvious lying. The WAHM has had to recant several things that she said because they just weren’t true. She said they customer had had the diaper for a few weeks, she had them for 1 week. She said that she didn’t peice together the inner layer, had to recant that when pictures were shown. She is lying over and over and over and instead of saving her butt, she is burying it. I would NEVER purchase from her after this.

    A little humility goes a long way if you want to be a WAHM. Too much pride. What’s that saying? Oh yeah, pride cometh before a fall.

    You are seriously falling WAHM.

    And if you really were trying to fix it privately, the customer wouldn’t have felt the need to take it public. You were trying to get out of a situation without refunding as you should have. Had I got diapers that looked like the ones you sold her, I would absolutely want a refund. Maybe the customer felt bad at first to ask for a refund, but later, after dealing with your crappy attitude, decided she didn’t want your crappy diapers along with that crappy attitude. Did you think that YOU might be the reason she decided she wanted a refund instead of a fix?

    What a screwed up attitude you have.

  16. DSDM2 says:

    I ate min the last time. We made a roast.

    It helps stop PPD and other PP health issues.

  17. agrace says:


  18. Ashley says:

    Why is that name ringing a bell? I wish my mom was online, I could SWEAR that Turtle Tails/clothmomof4 is a scammer. She was just telling me about someone with a similar name on Sewing Mamas who scammed on DS.

  19. Mamatutu says:

    Not cool, lots of ppl do.

  20. The Bored Bitch says:

    DSDM-did you guys see this one?

    Today, 09:47 AM #1 Report Post
    Nikkis_Little_Ladies’s Avatar
    Registered Users
    Formerly: Nikk25_3

    Join Date: Jan 2007
    Location: South Carolina
    Posts: 1,848
    Ratings: 27
    Feedback: 100%
    My Mood:

    I was so DISGUSTED at chucrch this monring that I….
    Gathered my kids and LEFT!!!!

    I don’t know how to take this all in. To start off we are kinda new there, only been a hand full of times. My landlords are the ones who got us going there. They are members. This is a Good ol’ Southern baptist church and until now I loved it there.

    So we are sitting in our sunday school class and the preacher starts off as usual, then he goes on to tell a joke. To me the joke was fine at 1st, then it became a racial joke. !! I was just beside myself!

    The joke went like this. Please don’t take offense to my posting this. I just need to make SURE that I am getting it right and that I am not wrong to be totally disgusted by this.

    ” A man goes gulfing and desides to use the robotic feild. So he goes in sets his balls down and starts to gulf. The robot says you don’t use that club for that one, you use this one. So the man continues and when hes done he says man this was my best game yet! I did the best I have even done.

    He then comes back the next week and asks for the robot again. The man says I’m sorry but we had to get rid of them. He says well why? The man says that the silver chrome on the robots was causing the other gulfers to be distracted by the shining. So the man says well why didn’t you just paint them black? He says well I tried, but it didnt work out, three of them went on welfare, one laid out for a week, four of them robbed the station down the road and one is running for president.”

    Worse part, 1/2 the room laughed. The other 1/2 just sat there.

    I was so disgusted that I left the room, got my kids and we left.

    Was I wrong? Did I take it the wrong way? I’m so against anything of that nature… I could just cry right now.

    Today, 09:52 AM #5 Report Post
    xxxvolc0mxchikxx’s Avatar
    Registered Users

    Join Date: Feb 2008
    Location: eugene oregon
    Posts: 114
    Ratings: 7
    Feedback: 100%
    My Mood:

    Re: I was so DISGUSTED at chucrch this monring that I….
    HAHAHAH THATS A DAMN FUNNY JOKE THO!!!!!!!…..guess you’d have to have a sense of humor to laugh…..OR not be threatened by race……i guess its just me—-none of my friends would be offended…….NOR are they all white…so …..


  21. Jennifer (ferrferr) says:

    It gets better .. she said her hubby is black .. He’s not. Nor are her kids … and she has another good zinger on her myspace like the “my best friends are white people”.

    I screen capped it all too. 😉

  22. DSDM2 says:

    ohhhhh… I hadn’t been on…. off to see it!

  23. subpariq says:

    Someone want to tell me why ds seems so set on protecting racists? Closing that thread when nobody was out of line really showed which side of the fence they sit on when it comes to racism. Shouldn’t really be a surprised given their refusal to make a diversity forum when they have a subforum for “women that pick their noses and eat it.” I am really disgusted by the fact that ds seems to be making no efforts to hide their racism. The stupid fucking mods do the little reprimand, “there are better ways to get your point accross.” Go fuck yourselves. Why not reprimand the fucking assholes that spew racist shit. “There are better ways to be a decent human being.” They wouldn’t recognize that though. They volunteer for a known bigot. The mods continue to associate with a known bigot. You are the company you keep. Just sayin’.

  24. Mamatutu says:

    Check this out LMAO someone posted this on her MS page

  25. subpariq says:

    Who’s page is that?

  26. Mamatutu says:


  27. Ashley says:

    Disgusting racist shit. What is wrong with people.

  28. subpariq says:

    I am furious with ds for supportig that shit.

  29. Madre says:

    i thought she said her dh was black

  30. Jennifer (ferrferr) says:

    She did say her husband is black. She’s a lying sack of shit. I screen capped it all too .. you know in case anything gets deleted. :p

  31. subpariq says:

    You know I don’t really even care about that asshole so much as I care that DS as an organization is promoting bigotry by reprimanding people for pointing out racism and allowing ignorant assholes to spew their hatred. We saw what a bigot Lee Dodd is with regard to LDS. Refusing to have a cultural diversity forum when it is so obviously needed is really a thorn in my side. And all the mods and admin that volunteer for this bigot make me sick. Maybe I should email all Lee’s advertisers a link to the bigot article and start an online petition for people to sign.

  32. DSDM2 says:

    I will blog it… give me a few hours to get some things done first.
    Crazy house right now.

  33. MajKitab says:

    Those crappy diapers shouldve NEVER left the house without FULL DISCLOSURE of their condition.
    The buyer is a very nice Mama and that WAHM owes her an apology big time!

  34. big-mama says:

    I finally left feedback. I had held back because I felt bad for her. She told me my thread was giving her high bp and would ruin her homebirth.

    This whole situation was just aweful

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